Friday, October 22, 2010

To post or to not post????


Four generations


 
What to do when it's been so long between posts? You take a deep breath and begin to type, knowing that no one really cares about your posts anyway. Blogging is really for yourself, to get your thoughts out of your head, to maybe have 1 person say you made me laugh or think or cry, to let people know how your feeling without having to say it out loud as sometimes this is nearly impossible - as is the content of today's post. I know a most exceptional woman, one they write books about and have TV specials about their life with some famous person pretending to be that special someone, but this lady has had neither a book or a movie, but I guarantee it would be a brilliant one. She is a bright example of what a Wife, Mother, and Friend should be, I know because this exceptional woman is my very own Grandmother - Pauline Vivian Rimstidt. This is the very woman that my daughter was named after. She has fed the hungry, paid for water heaters and furnaces for people, given people loans, helped people learn to read, bought fancy shoes for little girls whose parents could not afford such things, and there is no telling how many secrets she will take with her to her grave. When she meets her Savior he will open his arms and say "Well done my good and faithful servant, well done!!!" She is under Hospice care right now and our family mourns. We are already grieving for a heart that still beats. What a curious thing to do? We are so riddled with sadness that it is even hard to see the life we still have within us. We have reminders of the beauty that's around us, in a neighbor, a friend, and the children. My children have seen me cry for my Grandmother - I am certainly not as strong around them as I'd wish, but they both rose to the occasion to both melt my heart and make me laugh. I cry and sweet sweet Vivian says "Mommy do you need a cuddle?" Yes I do! and Logan says, "mommy do you need a hug (he hugs and then says) all better huh?!?" It is cute that a 4 year old knows when you need a cuddle and a 2 year old thinks a hug makes everything better! Well honey almost - you did make me smile! Grandma will soon meet her maker and in my opinion God took some extra time making her - she is so special in so many ways - way better than myself though I strive to be more like her with each day! I can see my Grandpa pacing the gates to see his wife of 70 years! Their love was magic, everyone who knew them knew how in love they were and how amazing their bond was! He'll say hi girlkid and she'll say Paul! I pray for her to have a peaceful exit from this life to her next life. I pray for her last breath to be taken with her hand in one of her sons or her daughter-in-laws, maybe not so much for her, but for us the family. Knowing that she is not alone and held securely in a loved ones hand makes me feel more comfortable with her leaving. Taking her last travel. If you are not a believer and your reading this, I respect that and hope that your will pray YOUR prayer for my family and think warm thoughts of my grandmother - she is worth the energy trust me! If you knew my Grandma, your life has been blessed and if not you'll just have to have faith in the words I say - she is magnificent. I love and will miss you so much Grandma! The tears streaming, my heart aching, but I want you to cross to the other side of the river Grandma - it's your time to go...I love you! 

Your loving granddaughter,
Stephanie Rimstidt Kirkpatrick