Certifications

Wow, it has been so long and now I come to you with so much information I am like a child ready to laugh who just took a huge bite of mashed potatoes! WATCH OUT!!!

Whoot whoot, guess who got Zumba certified! I am so excited to begin my party sessions, uh I mean classes! Firstly, I need to learn the choreography. I left my training knowing one song and not well to do without messing up and certainly not well enough to teach others. I needed a day to recover. You see I am struggling with nasty Limes Disease that just keeps me tired and stiff so flinging around was a bit tough. I am so glad I did it, I have been talking about it for some time so it is nice to bite the bullet and get that little peace of paper.

I kind of had an opportunity fall in my lap and it would be a huge mistake to not take advantage of it. a brand new fitness facility, teaching Pilates AND now Zumba. When the kids (now 8 and 6) are both on full days at school this is going to fit nicely into my morning schedule. Next year, I can teach in lots of locations several times a day.

Well I found this draft that I never got around to posting, but I guess better late than never. I have 6 regular girls for both Pilates and Zumba but there are usually a few people who just come in for that day here and there. I am still having some major health issues, but thankfully beginning to get a handle on things and seeing some light in my tunnel. I will post more on this later.

To post or to not post????



Four generations



 

What to do when it's been so long between posts? You take a deep breath and begin to type, knowing that no one really cares about your posts anyway. Blogging is really for yourself, to get your thoughts out of your head, to maybe have 1 person say you made me laugh or think or cry, to let people know how your feeling without having to say it out loud as sometimes this is nearly impossible - as is the content of today's post. I know a most exceptional woman, one they write books about and have TV specials about their life with some famous person pretending to be that special someone, but this lady has had neither a book or a movie, but I guarantee it would be a brilliant one. She is a bright example of what a Wife, Mother, and Friend should be, I know because this exceptional woman is my very own Grandmother - Pauline Vivian Rimstidt. This is the very woman that my daughter was named after. She has fed the hungry, paid for water heaters and furnaces for people, given people loans, helped people learn to read, bought fancy shoes for little girls whose parents could not afford such things, and there is no telling how many secrets she will take with her to her grave. When she meets her Savior he will open his arms and say "Well done my good and faithful servant, well done!!!" She is under Hospice care right now and our family mourns. We are already grieving for a heart that still beats. What a curious thing to do? We are so riddled with sadness that it is even hard to see the life we still have within us. We have reminders of the beauty that's around us, in a neighbor, a friend, and the children. My children have seen me cry for my Grandmother - I am certainly not as strong around them as I'd wish, but they both rose to the occasion to both melt my heart and make me laugh. I cry and sweet sweet Vivian says "Mommy do you need a cuddle?" Yes I do! and Logan says, "mommy do you need a hug (he hugs and then says) all better huh?!?" It is cute that a 4 year old knows when you need a cuddle and a 2 year old thinks a hug makes everything better! Well honey almost - you did make me smile! Grandma will soon meet her maker and in my opinion God took some extra time making her - she is so special in so many ways - way better than myself though I strive to be more like her with each day! I can see my Grandpa pacing the gates to see his wife of 70 years! Their love was magic, everyone who knew them knew how in love they were and how amazing their bond was! He'll say hi girlkid and she'll say Paul! I pray for her to have a peaceful exit from this life to her next life. I pray for her last breath to be taken with her hand in one of her sons or her daughter-in-laws, maybe not so much for her, but for us the family. Knowing that she is not alone and held securely in a loved ones hand makes me feel more comfortable with her leaving. Taking her last travel. If you are not a believer and your reading this, I respect that and hope that your will pray YOUR prayer for my family and think warm thoughts of my grandmother - she is worth the energy trust me! If you knew my Grandma, your life has been blessed and if not you'll just have to have faith in the words I say - she is magnificent. I love and will miss you so much Grandma! The tears streaming, my heart aching, but I want you to cross to the other side of the river Grandma - it's your time to go...I love you! 

Your loving granddaughter,

Stephanie Rimstidt Kirkpatrick

Coming and Going

Vivian's first trip to the dentist - she said "When do we get to come back?"

Our trip to see Great Grandma Pauline - You can tell someone LOVES his Great G'ma!

Vivian's Christmas Program at her School - they all did a wonderful job!

Logan got to meet Mrs. Claus - he wanted nothing to do with Santa!

As the end of the year approaches and all the hope that Christmas promises, we have to make time to be thankful for all our many blessings this year. What a wonderful year we have had and oh how busy we have been. We are leaving shortly - 2 hours for Florida (in a Ford Focus). Oh yes, we are driving. Now we are hoping that leaving at night makes it easier for the children at least that is the goal - if it is not - we're just all going to be miserable! We did buy a DVD player to occupy the children. When I was a kid I remember playing all sorts of silly games to keep us occupied and well mostly I slept...curious! Well now kids have it made - maybe that is why people aren't as creative as they used to be - we're all plugged in couch potatoes that can't stand silence. I suppose I should speak for myself. I play the TV nearly all day - not for the children but for myself. I get lonely, I can't stand the silence and I just need some noise. We also play the radio a lot which ALWAYS ends in a dance session. We move the table out of the kitchen and then we have the whole room and Vivian has noticed that at night time she can see her reflection on the sliding glass door - something I used to do to practice my ballet ALL the time. One of Logan's first words was dance and he is quite good for such a little guy. Vivian puts on shows for me and wears all kinds of costumes - sometimes we have to do quick changes in the middle of a show - it cracks me up. I always wondered how I just grew to love dance so much, but after watching my children I now believe you are just born with.

We have been so busy with trips this year: Annapolis - MD, Chicago - IL, Palm Coast - FL, Rockport - IN, Grafton - OH, Scotland - UK, and I feel like I am forgetting a dozen more trips. We've had loads of people visit which is always so exciting. Funny how sometimes you think life gets boring and then you review your year and think how did we pack all that in a year? I am hopeful to having another year packed full of fun - my kids sure make my life a joy and my husband keeps me laughing. I am so blessed and I wish you all a blessed New Year!

Merry Christmas!

News and Stuff

So when I write news I think everyone thinks we're having another baby, which is not the case...breath! BUT I am having my veins fixed in my legs - can I get an AMEN! Come on ladies...AMEN! Oh the pain in my legs will be gone and the embarassment factor will be a thing of the past (you know like glow in the dark braceletts and pegging your jeans)! Ahhh...speaking of the late 80's...I am having my 20 year high school reunion next year - that is so wild to me. I mean I know I am getting older, but NOT THAT OLD! Wow! Oh the big hair days - just think how much time we wasted making our hair stand 4 fingers high from our scalp. If we would have known those photos would make everyone laugh someday would we have still done it?!? On other big news (no Mom I am Not having a baby) I made an apple crisp. Yes, for all of you baking type Moms your thinking that is the easiest thing in the world to make and I know that now, but I looked at them with thier crumbly top and yummy gooiness and thought I could never make anything that good. Ah hah - I was ever so wrong, but who knew it took sooo many darn apples! LOL. I am a decent cook - I make a nice meal for my family every night, but you know how things start to feel like they just repeat, like groundhog day over and over - well here is a new place to find some yummy recipes www.thecooksnextdoor.wordpress.com
Hope you like it, it seems like it will be a real help and right now they are having a giveaway, we all like FREE stuff!
Kids - Well Vivian is such a joy and just comes away with the best things. Tonight for her bedtime prayer she said God bless all the children of the world and give them all jammies to wear - wouldn't that be nice! Logan has found his screaming voice and learned that he can climb which means he climbs on every bit of furniture we own and then screams when I take him down. He is the most cuddly little baby I have ever known! They are sweet with eachother every now and again - oh how I love those times!
Fraser - his hours are better at work and he has been home most nights, but tonight is a late one. He will be tired when he comes home. He is meant to come home early tomorrow since he has put in so many hours - we'll see how that goes. He has been doing reformers and of course is in perfect shape, I am so lucky! Too bad he has to look at cottage cheese legs...lol! I am the one that carried two babies right?!?
Me - well I am going insane, tired of looking at these tired old saggy legs so I am getting a workout program that is called of all things - Insanity. I wish I could tell you more about it, but apparently you do this workout and eat certain foods and by the end of it you have a 6 pack! Ha ha...well that is what happened with all the people on the infomercial. I would be happy with small curd cottage cheese - hahaaaaaaa!

Time for bed -
God bless all the children of the world and may they all have jammies!

Emotions a la Mode

This Summer has been an emotional roller coaster; the highs, the lows and the unexpected outburst. Well we have had a very exciting Summer with a trip to Scotland, many wonderful guests including Mom Mom and Big Pappy, the family from Florida and Mom's friend Ellie. The kids and I went on a wonderful trip to Annapolis where I was able to see three of my very dear friends - Megan, Erin (Tissy) and Emily. It was so wonderful to see my friends, how I wish I could be nearer so we could just grab a cuppa and catch up. We also went to Chicago this past weekend for a short but sweet visit with Tissy. We went to Navy Pier and rode the Ferris wheel; unknowingly, I gained a fear of heights and a weak stomach for things like that over the years.


I also found out that several of my friends are expecting babies and that is always exciting, so gals happy pregnancy, delivery and may your newborn be a good sleeper! I realized the other day that I am one year younger than I thought - I don't know how this happens - when your a kid you know that your 7.5 and 2 days old, but when your an adult you can loose a whole year! So I realized that I am 37 going on 38 in December and well I am still young! You know maybe we should have another. Maybe it won't be so hard the 3rd time around. Maybe the child will be a good sleeper and I won't have to wait till the baby is one for a full nights sleep. Maybe my body can handle it without preeclampsia or my veins bursting open in my legs. Maybe maybe maybe...oh I want a baby again! I am sure the feeling will fade Mom don't worry! LOL!



This feeling is compounded by the choice to wean Logan. This was a process all it's own. you see I wanted to wean him, like his sister, at one year. So I tried giving him milk which then came back up in the stinky mess you could imagine from warm curdled milk - makes my stomach still turn. I finally had his one year checkup and expressed this concern with milk to the doctor. Apparently, Logan has a milk allergy and his eczema on his face was a physical sign of this - who knew. He is now happy as can be, totally weaned and drinking 20 oz. of soy milk a day. This comes with great joy and sadness all at the same time. I have been pregnant or nursing since the end of 2005 less September and October of 2007. So I was kind of over it to be very honest, BUT when you actually stop you do go through this odd withdrawal thing. I gave him the best milk I could and I did it for over a year - I should be proud, but as the milk still leaks I think maybe I should have given him more. The bottle restricts my view of his gorgeous face before his nap or bedtime. Its the little things - he used to rub me, pat me and pull away just to give me a smile. That is all gone. That may be the last I nurse a baby - forever! That is sad to me.



On the other hand I was able to leave for the whole day which prompted the said emotional outburst. My Grandmother (and when I say that word I mean the GRAND part of it) fell and broke her hip, she had to have surgery and is in a very painful stint of rehabilitation. So I have been terribly worried about her. I am a caregiver by nature - I want to take care of people, I want to make them better and I want to make them laugh! Of course I want to be with G'ma but the reality of taking 2 kids to see someone in terrible pain reminds you that you just can not be with her. So anting to be there and not being able to is a very sad thing. Then my Mother was going through some very scary testing which compounded the wanting to be someplace else factor. These women are the rocks of my existence and I want to see that they are well. So finally Fraser and I worked it out that I would go last Saturday to be with my G'ma and my Mother (whose results came back in the best way they could - though she still will have some pain). I got in the car and about 20 miles into my journey I began to cry. At first for my Rocks - the pillars to models of my life and then for me. You - you ask? Yes, selfishly me! I had not been alone for years now. Always caring for a child, no breaks, and never a full day! I cried so hard, it was liberating. I sang in the car as loud as I could and off key too, but I did not care! I smiled as I past people, I laughed at the little boy making faces out his window, I was never in too much of a hurry to be a cordial driver, I cried because I found myself again. I am still Stephanie, yes, I am Stephanie the Mom and wife, but I am also Stephanie the silly gal that my husband fell in love with, the dancer, the girl who always wanted to look just so, the energetic person with a jest for life, always a smile, always a hug - that's me. In those 7 hours I drove that day I released myself again. I will always be a Mom (and I might add I am pretty damn good at it), but am also STEPHANIE! Don't loose yourself in your kids - be you, be silly, laugh at yourself, smile at someone, call your friends (or Skype), really make your husband remember why he loves you and lastly take pride in YOU not just your family! Well I gotta go now - I'm going to put on some make up today!

Hair, boobs and skin oh my...

Yes, I said it. Hair, Boobs and Skin Oh My. Seriously, why doesn't anyone tell you about the "side effects" of breastfeeding. Don't get me wrong it is still a WONDERFUL experience, but it would have been nice to know that my hair would begin to fall out, break and go REALLY grey because of it. Also, uhhhh the girls are going through a lot these days - I mean stretched, pulled, punched, compressed and the breastfeed smell. Those mommies that have experienced it know what I mean - it is the sort of off milk smell with sweat combined. I guess it is hormonal, but geez, I already feel like the girls are not part of my female body anymore and now the smell makes me wish at times they were not! The skin problems are crazy. Combination skin my behind - this is like freeze dried in some areas and pools of olive oil in others. AND I even have the dreaded eyebrow zit that will NOT go away. Like a volcano hiding, just waiting for the right moment to explode - bubbling over. YUCK!

The kids posing!

Fraser racing and winning a mountain bike race. Unreal and not really very good for my mental health...haha. I mean here I am with puke on my shoulder day in and out and here he is no training and wins this race. My fat is sagging and hanging from places it really should not and here comes Mr. Fit with his rock hard legs and bottom (oh yea I can say butt here). Anyway, I really am quite proud of my hubby. It does does make me ever so slightly sick that he's so perfectly in shape and my body looks like it has been food processed. Well enough drama I suppose...later friends!

The Arrival!

Well after many tears, a lot of stress and worry and my hormone levels at peak proportions - we FINALLY had our perfect little bundle! This is how it went...

The days kept clicking by and I began to realize that this VBAC was just not happening. Two weeks past the first scheduled cesarean and I was beginning to look like a blimp. I have to say we gave it our all and I do feel so much better for that, but it just was not happening the old fashioned way! That is not to say that good ole Mother Nature wasn't still playing her tricks on me with the contractions here and there and the getting ready to go to the hospital in the middle of the night only to shower and feel totally fine again. Oh I walked, I nearly ran, I ate spicy food, drank raspberry tea, I even soaked my feet in warm water. I tried EVERYTHING, but it just was not happening. So the 6th of August came around and I knew it was going to be another c-section. So on the 7th, Fraser and I headed to the hospital. We arrived at 8AM and things began to happen so quickly. People coming and going, poking needles in, taking blood, sign here, empty your bladder, put this on - take that off, wash your face and by the way, you are having contractions you know! Figures...damn you Mother Nature...you pretty much suck! LOL! Just kidding, it was actually funny at that point. Mine and Fraser's parents arrived. They were ready to take us early, 9:30AM. Everyone guesses how much the baby will weigh - my Dr. said 8 lbs. 6 oz., nurses say 7 lbs. something and I say 9 lbs. They all laugh at me. So Fraser suits up - surgical mask and all and off I go to get prepped. I felt like I was at home in some respects, you see I had nearly the exact same team from my first section. Same Dr., same nurse, Dr's assistant, same baby Dr...it was VERY comforting. God finds ways to make things OK. I was nervous, but not as much. I had a qualified team who delivered my gorgeous baby girl and now that same team for my 2nd child. They bring Fraser in; I am already in the crucifix position (arms strapped down), oxygen on and numb from my breasts down. Then they start and everyone is just having like water cooler chat, we're all joking and talking like this was just a simple broken arms or something. Things got quiet though when they are ready to remove the baby. He says ok now some tugging and I know that means I will be jerked around so that did not freak me out as much as it did last time. The anaesthesiologist took a photo of the head out and showed me - totally fascinating! Then Dr. Teter says ok we're going to take the baby out now, you'll feel "the fall". Ok well the fall with Vivian was like dropping a pebble and this was like an avalanche! I felt like my whole body just fell through the operating table. It scared me a lot and Fraser just held on to me and told me it was ok and that the baby was out...then they say it's a BOY! A boy! I just could not believe I had a boy! I saw him and heard him for the first time. He was gorgeous, Perfect and had a good set of lungs on him! What a miracle! All the other stuff meant absolutely NOTHING now! I have a healthy baby boy! They had to put me back together again and it took much longer this time because...(get this)...I actually got a miniature tummy tuck. Well not really, but they do take away the old incision so that is like a what 1/4 in. tummy tuck in my mind! Ha ha!

Arthur Logan Kirkpatrick

9lbs. 4 oz., looks like Mommy was right eh!

21 1/2 in.

Ten beautiful finger and ten sweet lil' toes

They were doing all the tests of our son Logan and we had to look from afar. I got really upset because he was crying and all the dr's had their backs turned doing paperwork, I was crying and begging someone to be with him and finally the anaesthesiologist went over and rubbed his wee feet! My boy! I have a boy! It still fills my eyes with tears. They reunited us as a family and gave Logan to Fraser and we just cried and cried. I finally got to hold him as they wheeled me away. It took forever to get me stable enough to have the grandparents in, my temp had dropped considerably and they had to wrap me in the odd heated air blanket thing. Anyway, they finally all came in and I was holding Logan and said..."It's a boy!" and well you can see their reaction above! Pure joy from everyone. Even Vivian was excited to meet him. Advice: don't marry the idea of a certain type of birth. At the end of the day...you were all right...I have my healthy baby boy and life is so GOOD! I love this wee guy, he is such a sweet baby, he smells just like Fraser and he is ALL mine! God is good!